Dating should be an opportunity to explore what you want from romantic relationships and to develop the skills you need for healthy connections. Both you and the people you date deserve to feel safe as you discover and communicate your boundaries, wants, and needs.
Boundaries are most effective when we feel comfortable with the container (a.k.a. limits) we are creating for ourselves. Oftentimes, boundaries help us honor the answer to the question “What do I need?”.
While experiencing a pretty intense emotional reaction, I remembered a powerful truth: I AM NOT MY FAMILY. Their thoughts, behaviors, and actions do not belong to me, do not define me, and do not limit me.
Limits don’t negate choices. Limits aren’t consequences or punishment. Instead, limits help young people understand boundaries-- their own and other people’s.
As parents, caregivers, and supporters, it’s important to set limits in order to protect our energy and time. Boundaries support us in living with intention and getting our needs met. Furthermore, each one of us has the powerful responsibility to determine our boundaries and to create a life that reflects these values.